


love ain't easy (when you ain't here makin' me crazy)

by heavydiirtysoul



Category: Twenty One Pilots
Genre: Fluff, Jealousy, M/M, jealous tyler is jealous, joshler - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-05
Updated: 2017-03-05
Packaged: 2018-09-28 12:56:02
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 901
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10101710
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/heavydiirtysoul/pseuds/heavydiirtysoul
Summary: He knows he has no reason to be jealous, and yet here he is - jealous.





	

"I have to pick up Jesse in an hour. Wanna come?"

He doesn't exactly dislike Jesse. In fact, he's quite fascinated by the guy, his eccentric, outgoing personality, how he is so unapologetically himself in a very, very different way than Tyler himself is. 

Somehow, the simple realization that he likes Jesse, actually, makes it even worse. He knows what Josh sees in him, knows how long they've been friends, knows he has no reason to be jealous - especially when he gets to see Josh every single day, unlike Jesse.

And still - he can't help the barely suppressed huff and the eyeroll.

" _What._ "

Josh is already slighty pissed, Tyler can tell. They've been over this before. 

"Nothing."

"I thought you liked Jesse."

"I do."

"Then what's your problem, Tyler?"

Josh stares him down over the edge of his laptop, and Tyler shrinks a little in his seat opposite of him.

"I said _it's nothing_." His voice is dripping with venom, and he knows it's stupid, still can't help it.

"Fine."

Silence, and then Josh shuts the laptop and gets up, grabs his jacket and his board. 

"I'll go skate. Text me when you're back in your right mind."

The door falling shut makes Tyler flinch. 

He doesn't text Josh, instead hides in his bunk and tries to write, but the words won't come, and when they do, he hates them and eventually deletes everything again. 

About two hours later he starts to get nervous. Jesse and Josh should be back at the bus by now, and he considers texting Josh for a brief moment, decides against it when he hears familiar voices outside.

Don't be a dick, he thinks, sighs deeply, finally gets up and makes his way over to the door of the bus to let the two in.

"Heeey", Jesse beams, and before Tyler can do anything about it, he's being pulled into a tight hug by the taller man, familiar scent of fruity perfume and laundry detergent and the overwhelming warmth of Jesse's fake fur coat and for a second, he's appalled by himself and wonders how he could ever feel anything even close to resentment towards Jesse. 

Josh gives Tyler a meaningful look with raised eyebrows, and Tyler rolls his eyes again, mouths 'talk later?', and Josh nods. It's a temporary truce.

The day goes by, and when their show comes to an end and it's close to midnight, he finds himself lying awake in his bunk.

"Josh?"

"Hm?", comes a tiny voice from the upper bunk, and Tyler sticks his head out of the refined space to find Josh doing the same, one arm dangling over the edge of his bed and down towards Tyler.

"Hey", he says, smiles carefully as if they hadn't spend the whole day together. This is different, they both know. 

"Hey."

"I'm sorry for how I acted earlier."

"I just don't understand it, Tyler. You say you like him, but whenever he visits, you act like someone's trying to steal your favorite toy."

Tyler squirms, sighs uncomfortably, can't look Josh in the eye.

"Wait, are you -?"

Josh half crawls over the edge of the bed, stares at Tyler. He can almost see the dawning realization behidn Josh's eyes.

"You're _jealous_!"

"Am not."

"Sure are! Tyler, you - you know you're my best friend. My _boyfriend_. I love you. He's - Jesse is cool and everything, but you're.. You're Tyler."

He says it like it's supposed to mean more than that. 

"Yeah, I'm Tyler", he repeats, tries to understand whatever that _is_ supposed to mean in the grand scheme of things. "I'm - I don't know. I'm scared you'll realize you'd be off better with him than with me."

"That's not true, Ty."

"It is, though. He's far more.. comfortable. With himself, with who he is. I'm not even out to my parents. Don't even know if I'll ever be. You wouldn't have to keep it a secret with him. He wouldn't ask you to. He's.. less selfish. I don't even know if he _ever_ did something selfish, and I do it all the time. Expect you to stay in the closet for my own sake. That's just - shitty."

The words come pouring out now, as if someone has pulled the plug to the sink that holds all his deepest, darkest secrets.

"Tyler."

Josh comes crawling into his bunk, like so many times before, and Tyler can hear Mark shuffle and groan in his sleep, hopes he doesn't wake up, like so many times before. It's all one giant pile of repeated nights, secrets, more secrets, more nights. It's hard to seperate them, they all blend together by now.

"Tyler, I love you. And I don't mind keeping it private, I told you. I meant it. Still do."

Arms wrap around Tyler's middle, press circles into his back. 

"I love you too. I don't.. Want to do this to you."

"You're not doing anything to me. Unless you're talking about making me a better person, giving me safety, making me feel loved, then - sure. You're doing a whole lot to me. And thank God you do."

He can't help the smile, nuzzles into Josh's shoulder.

Steals a kiss.

"I'm sorry", he says, and he means it.

"Accepted", says Josh, and it sounds genuine.

Falling asleep is easier now, and he drifts off and wonders whatever he did to deserve someone like Josh in his life.

**Author's Note:**

> send me prompts on [tumblr](http://www.outerspacejosh.tumblr.com)!


End file.
